Tuesday, August 7, 2007

Low-rise jeans: Puke-a-licious fashion

Could there possibly be a more revolting item of clothing than low-rise jeans?
Sunday afternoon, while traveling about, I spotted a woman in front of me with about three inches of pasty white ass sticking above the waistband of her jeans. She didn't exactly have a becoming figure, but even if she had the body of Kate Moss, it would still be disturbing.
Since when did women decide that "builder's bum"—the sort of thing normal people used to laugh at and be disgusted by at the same time—was fashionable or sexy? Again, I don't care how much of a babe you are—approach me wearing low-rise jeans and I'll run and hide from you. Guaranteed.
Why not just cut out the middleman and prance around in a thong? At least that would be sexier. Exhibitionist, to be sure, but sexy. However, a few inches of asscrack suspended above dungarees is not sexy nor alluring. It's a turn-off of immense proportions.
Of course, the fun doesn't end with women. Some men have jumped on the ass parade as well. I'll never forget the time I was standing in line for a train ticket from the machines at King's Cross station. A twentysomething man wearing low-rise jeans bent over to collect his ticket. Mere words cannot convey how ill I suddenly felt.
I'd faint with embarassment if I was informed that I was showing even the slightest hint of bum. I'd rather be a Simon Cowell-like "Priest of High Trousers" than wear my jeans or shorts too low.
I can't help thinking that the sort of people who wear low-rise jeans are either not very intelligent or that they (wrongly) assume that the rest of us share their obvious rear-end fetish.
It's just disturbing that what used to be the hallmark of less-than-slim people sitting or crouching in distressed pairs of pants has now become fashionable to the point where no-one seems to blink an eye at it. Except for me, that is. I not only blink, but keep them firmly shut.


East of Eden said...


I hat the low-rise jeans! It's so popular that you have a hard time finding regular jeans! When I would see my students wearing low-risers, and flashing the class, I would go make them change into their gym shorts!

kristen said...

So glad there's at least one guy who doesn't like to see women's a**es coming out of their clothing. The same could be said for their bums coming out the other end, as in super short shorts. Yech!

I have low-rise jeans, only because that's all that's out there. However; they come in varying degrees of low. Mine are just slightly below the waist. I don't see how girls can wear the ones that ride below the hip bone.

Unfortunately we live in a society where sex sells and there's a flagrant disregard for decency and modesty. I HATE seeing things I should not be seeing.

Nightdragon said...

"So glad there's at least one guy who doesn't like to see women's a**es coming out of their clothing."

Well, remember: I'm technically bisexual. But I don't care if someone's male, female, a hermaphrodite or a pan-sexual eunuch -- I don't want to see their butt cracks rising over their waistband. Sex may sell, but -- again I ask -- what is so sexy about it? A mini-skirt, for instance, is definitely sexy. Three inches of bum rising above one's waistband (or below-the-hips-band?) definitely isn't. Let's put it this way: my, ahem ... "member" isn't likely to stir at the sight of some moron showing their ass off. I'm much more likely to not only lose my libido for the rest of the day, but my appetite as well.

Tusk said...

Sheesh! Way to over-react with the loss of appetite!
Although I have to agree that it is not something I want to see on a regular basis, if at all.

Some things are better left to the imagination. And I hope I don't imagine quite a lot of things.

Pam said...

Bravo. Forget the haunted houses this Halloween - if you want a REAL fright come visit me at work. There's nothing like a college campus to put the fashion trends in overdrive. I can't walk to a meeting or to grab a coffee without finding myself behind at least two or three exposed buttcracks on my journey. And it seems people buy these travesties just a little too tight too, so they not only show the buttcrack but take even a normally nice ass and sort of squish it and push it up, so it looks like the wearer has an ass on top of an ass. OK, I'll stop now ... I'm getting queasy.